An Internet genre is emerging: two-sentence horror stories, just perfect for the Twitter generation. Here are my contribution to the genre.

Have you heard of two sentence horror stories?  I was introduced to them through one that went something like this:

“My son insisted that I check for monsters under the bed.  So I crouched down to have a look, and there was my son whispering in fright, “Daddy, I think there’s someone in my bed.”

There are plenty more all over the Internet, so I thought I would try my hand at writing a few myself.  Below are the results.  If you would like to add to the list, please place your two-sentence horror story in the comments below.

My two-sentence horror stories

I opened the cupboard in the old abandoned house, to find a single, dust-covered cup. I reached for it and…it bit me.

I couldn’t keep my eyes open any longer, so long after bed time.  I stumbled to the bathroom and removed my contacts, my dentures, my nose…

There are so many horror stories floating around about blind dates people meet on FaceBook.  Does that explain what the dagger and the branding iron are for…sweety?

“Wake up, Daddy,” my daughter cried, shaking me.  I got my wish – we’ve all been turned into gummy bears.

You know it’s going to be a bad day when you start walking forward and realize you are staring out of the back of your head, watching where you’ve just been.  You know it’s going to be a really, really bad day when you take your next step … down the stairs.

It was the funniest thing, the envelope that just arrived in the mail.  It is dated tomorrow, and inside is a page with a single work scribbled in lipstick: “Duck!”

My friend and I were just chatting on the phone when I heard a scream behind her.  My “What was that…” was cut off by a loud crunching sound.

I woke up naked, feeling chilly.  I propped myself up to see all the gorillas staring at me through the bars.

When I got online, both my Google and Facebook profiles were missing.  This was too strange, so I reached to type in another website, but I couldn’t find my hands.

Another day comes to an end, time to undress.  But – what’s this?!? – why are my clothes glued to my body?

Justin had never made so little sense before, blithering on such nonsense. Out for a walk…blinding lights…abducted by humans.

Ah there’s nothing like relaxing in the pool, under the watchful eyes of the hot sun. Hold on, why is the sun’s light coming up from below?

“Betty what did you put in these delicious cookies?” “Oh, some cocoa powder and cinnamon, a little arsenic and some cardamom- why?”

He hit “send” and off went the nastiest “I quit” email in history.  He reached into his pocket for the winning lottery ticket…but it wasn’t there.

Finally having overpowered her, the Vampire bent over her to suck her blood.  She looked up at her attacker and saw her own face!

I laughed with the kids as we piled up the leaves to jump in.  I laughed with them as they ran and jumped – Geronimo! – until they sank down into the pile, and just kept falling…

I went downstairs for a midnight snack.  Sure enough, when I opened the fridge door, I became a midnight snack.

My wife just hasn’t been the same since the car crash.  I don’t know what it is, but there’s just something about being dead.

Dahling, your coffee cake is simply divine, I just can’t get enough of it.  Wait a minute, did one of those raisins just move?

Last night I dreamed I was being tortured by solid stone gargoyles as the clock struck noon.  My co-workers might think I’m nuts, but how come the lunch room is suddenly full of solid stone gargoyles?

I was running with all my might, desperate to get away from the shadows I was sure were chasing me.  I had to stop, to catch my breath…my breath…I wasn’t breathing!

After flushing the toilet, I turned to wash my hands, but I couldn’t see anything.  Oh, not – too late! –  my head must have fallen in the toilet just as I was flushing.

My son keeps telling me he’s being bullied by his friends and wants me to help him to hide.  Should I remove his name from his gravestone?

“Justin, please tell the class what you did this summer.”  “I played soccer and I gave Brad a lobotomy; I don’t think he’ll be coming to school this year.”

“Please. God, don’t make me take that test tomorrow,” I prayed.  That’s when the plane fell on my house.

He looked up at his calendar absentmindedly, when suddenly terror struck him.  Yesterday was the tax deadline.

After the meal, I decided to take a snooze on the couch in front of the TV.  Why did I wake up in a padded room?

The bathroom mirror was dirty, so I took a cloth to wipe it clean.  As I wiped, I saw my reflection being wiped away, too.

The meal looked delicious – steak, potatoes, peas and French bread.  As I began to cut the steak, it let out an ear-piercing yell for help.

The alarm clock spared no mercy with its piercing cry.  I felt quite off-kilter when I reached the bathroom mirror, but I was relieved to see all three eyes staring back at me.

Have you ever awoken in the middle of the night and reached out to touch something that feels a lot like warm Jello?  I hope it doesn’t happen to me again; I have only one arm left.

I heard my wife’s voice call me in from the garage.  As I turn to go, my wife grabs my arm and  whispers, “Don’t go in there.  She has a knife.”

The radio news is reporting about a breakout of animals from the local zoo.  I reach to grab my drink and touch something furry that growls at me.

It’s that feeling of pure bliss, when all you want to do is to stare deep into your lovers beautiful eyes.  Until they suddenly gush with blood spraying out.

I turned on the radio, and the announcer was speaking.  “In other news, the world ended last night.”

This is your captain speaking.  The bad news is that we have been suffering some altitude problems; the good news is that we have been cleared to make an emergency landing in Hell.

Can you write a two-sentence horror story?  Please share in the comments below.